Why does my family make me the scapegoat?

Scapegoating is often a way for families to hide problems that they cannot face. At times the scapegoat targeted by the sibling who was always the favorite of the family. In that way, the less favored sibling becomes the repository of everything that is wrong in the family.

What happens to the family scapegoat?

As adults, family scapegoats may seek out dysfunctional relationships similar to what they encountered as children. Growing up as a family scapegoat might affect your mental health; however, it is possible to heal. The first step to recovery is rejecting the labels that your family has placed on you.

How do you know if you are a family scapegoat?

More specifically: Scapegoated adults often feel debilitated by self-doubt and ‘imposter syndrome’ in their relationships and in the work-place, and blame themselves for their difficulties. They often will develop ‘fawning’ behaviors, whereby they seek to please others and avoid conflict at any cost.

When a parent is the family scapegoat?

Research shows that scapegoating allows a parent to think of the family as healthier than it is. Scapegoating lets a parent minimize responsibility for and explain negative outcomes, enhancing a sense of control. The scapegoat role can be rotating, or it can target one child specifically.

How is the scapegoat chosen?

How Scapegoats Are Chosen. There is no rhyme or reason for how parents or caregivers decide to scapegoat a child. Parents might also scapegoat children based on skin color, sexual orientation, or gender identity. There are myriad reasons why a parent might choose to scapegoat a child, but it is never the child’s fault.

Is there a scapegoat in every family?

The scapegoating typically (but not always) begins in childhood and often continues into and throughout adulthood, although the role may be passed around to different family members at times.

What is scapegoating and how does it affect your family?

Scapegoating is an insidious form of family bullying that is destructive to both the target and family alike. Family should be a refuge for all, but becomes destructive through three main mechanisms – hostility, betrayal and ostracization of the scapegoat.

What is scapegoat child syndrome and how is it treated?

Scapegoat child syndrome is a continuous family dysfunctional pattern to fault a single child and keep him/her isolated in the family. This makes the scapegoat child secluded in the family who always has to take the onus of every minute problem that the family suffers.

Why do scapegoats keep coming back?

And because of the way that this universe functions, this pattern of being scapegoated comes back in the life of the scapegoat over and over again. Even if they do exit the original family group, they are likely to be turned into a scapegoat again in their lives.

How to heal from scapegoating?

Healing from such treatment first takes realizing the fault in your childhood image. You must understand that the things said about you were not true. When you make this realization, you can start to build yourself up with positive reinforcement. If you were a victim of scapegoating, then there is hope.